I am BAD

Michael Jackson said it and every one loved it.

But bad yes BAD, wicked, ugly, dirty.....all this and even more is not something that I as a woman can afford to be.

Now do not say who wants to be all this. Who wants to be bad. It is bad thing to be bad.

Right. But all I want is please give me the right to be human. Let me be good and bad. Why I as a woman expected to be just good. No I want to be complete, complete with my goodness and badness.

It is sad and heartbreaking to see that women around me do not get justice forget that even a benefit of doubt for they are bad women...

Why? Why? One thing for all those chairs which are supposed to deliver justice or scream orders are occupied by men, good men and bad men, but mostly men.

My idea let there me more women, women and more women.
Even better, bad women( bad as in men).

Lets SCREAM..............

They are screaming, ranting, shouting, hurling abuses. They are pained, disgusted and much much more than that. At least this is what, we here, sitting in Punjab thousands of miles from Mumbai get to see and hear. Mumbai is angry... every paper and new channel says.
Is Mumbai really angry? This is what I want to know for if this city and the Mumbaikars are really angry then there is some hope but if it is only for the papers and the television then it is better forgotten.

But then why is Mumbai angry? Because of the terror attack! This is not the first attack then why is Mumbai screaming now? Why did Mumbai or any of us scream, shout, hurl abuses when Punjab was burning or when rather even now as I write this, some family would be getting killed at the hands of terrorists in Kashmir or human rights would be trampled beneath the feet of armed forces in the North East... hell why is Mumbai screaming now.

They are screaming, they say our democracyos joke, they want president's rule, they want all politicians hung and people like Simi Garewal (sic) wants India to start a war on Pakistan. But then our democracy is not a joke and not even out polity. Simi Garewal can ask for a war for she knows she will never have to go on the border to fight. Leave that no one will even invite that haggard lady to come and entertain the forces.

And if she is ever called, then some channel will call her and there in TV dressed in white, this lady can again call for yet another war and also say, " lets keep a silence of two minutes for our dead soldier" (sic).

Scream, please do scream, respond please do not react, let Mumbaikars, Chennaikars, Ludhianakars every possible damn `kar' scream, but please scream each time someone is shot dead by the terrorist and let that be anywhere in the world. Open up your arms, broaden your boundaries, let us scream and scream for PEACE.

Foot steps

Foots steps from the past
came in silently
knocked on my door
a little loudly
my door, my home shut tight
for all these years
at first I didn' t let them in
but finally did
they gushed in like a strong wind from the past
I stood watching it striking my face
ruffling my hair
forcing me take a step back
once again into my past
teasing me with memories long forgotten
challenging me
and I did step back
one step
and let the foot steps brush away
the cobwebs cluttering the walls.

Lets sweat it out toghether

Dear Badals,

And by this I mean all but only those belonging to the high fi political family of Punjab. But then I would leave the little children out for I would never like to see them go through a life that the patriarch of this family Parkash Singh Badal has put the thousands and lakhs of children of Punjab through.
No power for almost entire day and the man who wants to be remembered as the architect of modern Punjab is actually sending us all back to the days of no power. No power in a state that prides itself for this Bhakra Dam and what not. Wow!!!
I invite the Badals to spend just one day sweating it out with the people. No I do not mean sweating out during the elections. This they do for power and not sewa like the senior Badal loves to say each time. It smacks of hypocrisy.
And above all the state which is reeling under power crisis which the experts say will only worsen, Badal junior, Sukhbir, asks his party MPs to vote against the N Deal. Take a walk some where far from Punjab, Sukhbir.

The quest

A strange kind of feeling has surrounded me these days... I use the word surround very carefully for I feel this feeling all around me. It travels with me as I leave my home for office or vice a verse... it comes back to me in middle of the night when I am dead asleep.... this feeling is beyond time and space.

Wait I can explain. All this began when one evening browsing through books at the Book Cafe I picked up Swati Chopra's Dharamsala Dairies. This is one book I wanted to read after I read about it in the Indian Express one Sunday. But then this is not just all, I have this special link with Dharamsala for I have studied in Sacred Heart Convent School, Sidhbari. I have spent the three best years of my life here... at least this is the way I think so.

At first I thought this book will just help me connect with Dharamsala and its environment once again which I had kind of lost in this humdrum of life. This was my simple idea. I began reading the book and thought, that I will be able to finish within a day or at the most two if I have to go to office. But then that was not to be. I would read, at the most five pages and put the book down so that the book never ends. No the style of writing is usual, just as the way most writers write in English these days. It is the journey of the author that I want to be a part of.

When the author talks about she sitting in the balcony of her guest house, I see myself, shuddered in a heavy woolen shawl with the clouds around me. Yes I remember the nights that I have spent as a child in a guest house in Barot where clouds would float in through the window in the dead of the night and I would try and catch them in my small hands...

When the author walks down the crowded bazaars of Mcleodganj I can see my looking at the shops from outside wanting to buy each and every thing that I can see... the dainty porcelain tea cup, the shiny jacket, the antique jewellery. And I end up buying steaming momos, eight for Rs 10...

The authors quest for Buddhism is slightly heavy for me. But I want sit in the monastery silently, lost in the thought, amongst the huge tall trees with a cold bare floor beneath me and look into the eyes of Buddha...

This is the book that I want to be for now..................

Contradictions....

At present I stand at crossroads.... and once again it is for Sidharth. When this boy was just two and half years old I had to chose my path... one that led to him and only him and the other that kept me on the track which every one my family, a good section of friends and honestly even a part of me wanted to stay on.. the usual marriage and family......

Anyways that is past.....and the choices have been long made.......but now once again I have to make some choices. Sidharth has been following his routine of behavioural therapy for quite some time now and suddenly I am told that in case he is put in a gluten free casein free diet, he can be cured of his autism. Confusing, for the data available on the net, for and against this theory, is equal.

Changing an entire diet plan, no wheat, no milk or milk products for an eight year old child who loves his fare share of chapattis, cookies and simply can not live without paneer is very tough and if I do not do that, will I be loosing out on a chance to cure my son.

I do not know, I just want the best for him but for now I am confused. I have been postponing this decision for very very long now and now I know it is not possible to postpone it any further. I have to take a decision but what.................

Khuda ke liye.................

At first I felt that this picture was kind of anti Americans. And as I voiced this opinion about the film to one of my friends the reply I got shook me from within. He remarked, " see America and Americans from the eyes of a Muslim."

Yes this film is a must must see. Must see for this film invokes in one self, totally new feelings, sensitivity and emotions. Directed by Shoaib Mansoor, it is common knowledge that this film is a great hit. It has a great music, excellent cast, story line, music, direction and this list of greats can go on and on. But amidst all these greats the film sends across its message of humanity so strongly and beautifully that it makes one cry.

While watching the film one cries when Shaan goes through his pain of being branded as a terrorist or when Maryam is duped into marrying her cousin who is a muslim fanatic and one cries even for Sarmad as his travels from a liberal to fanatic and them back. And after the film ends one cries for one self for how heartless, how inhuman we all have become.

This is one film which I recommend to all those friends of mine or those people who love to trash Islam and Muslims, all those people who without even having known a single Muslim throughout their lives, yet love to say that all Muslims are terrorist or that Islam is a regressive religion.

I will not go into the debate of religion for I personally do not believe in any one of them but yes I can never trash a person just because he or she belongs to certain religion, cast, creed or colour.

Khuda ke liye is a film for all of us for it helps bring to life those beautiful feelings that are we have all buried deep into our hearts.

Khuda ke liye watch Khuda ke liye.... give your self a chance........

Memory

Clich'ed it may sound but I am back and interestingly a friends of mine brought me back here. In her process of creating a blog I decided to revisit mine.

So much has changed not around me but in me and I like the changes. It is no use going over the reasons that have brought about these changes for they are nothing but reasons, it is me that I am loving more by each day.
Love yourself first and only then can you spread love around. I have been told this many a times in my life but then the meaning of this statement it depth and its magnaimity hit me in its true self just recently.
I am not ashamed to admit this for it is not very easy to find one self in all the humdrum around us. The noises inside me and the out side never let me meet my self.

I

GANGA

The music flows through my veins. I feel like Ganga, tranquil on the top but hiding a storm within. The cold choppy waters on the surface flow, rushing as if to meet someone waiting on the otherside, seive through my fingers as I bend over the side of the boat." Mem saheb shambhal ke,'' the voice of the boatman brings me back to the present. This is Hrishikesh and I let the magic, the mystery of Ganga flow through me. I let her enter me and pass through me, in turn acquainting me to the life of Ganga. I sit calm, let the biting cold water wash through me, wash my soul. This should have left me clean of my sins, isn't this the purpose of bathing in Ganga. And here I let her enter me. No! for me Ganga came in altogether different purpose. As her waters entered me, she whispered in my ear, " be like me. Let me take over you." And I let her. Ganga said," my water wash your dreams. Here see me. I am calm on the surface but dive into me and see how many lives I have hidden in my womb." Srilata died young and her husband immersed her ashes in Ganga. "But Srilata live in me even now. Look she wants to dress up as a newly wed bride, scented flowers woven in her hair, anklets tingling in her feet, bright red henna adorning her hands and feet. Pure white silk saree caressing her body." And then there is Ram Bahdur who wants to see his son grow up," I let him do that. Each year his son comes to my shores to pray for his fathers departed soul. And as Ram Bahadur's son dips his hand in me to pray, Ram Bahadur comes close to his son,'' says Ganga. " Lets flow together," tell me Ganga and I take water in my hand and stroll along. But what is this, its been just few steps that we have taken and all I have is a wet hand. I turn to look back, the sand beneath my feet rubs in between my toes. I look longingly at Ganga and she smiles back but flows on. There is another tale unfolding at the banks of Ganga.

Mind.....

It has been four months that I have stayed away and today a friend's mail helped me find my way back. So here is a big thanks to my friend first.

As I try to sift through my thoughts, searching for these little things that I want to share I find so many little butterflies flying inside me. No these are no butterflies in my stomach but little colourful thoughts, all so beautiful, all so very personal. And the most beautiful is Sidharth.

So here he is. Sidharth completed his first year in a normal school. At the end of the session I was given this report card which said, `promoted as per ability'. Along with the report card came a host of other comments. But what intrigued me the mostand continues to do till date is that Sidharth's psychologist has found his, `type of mind,' as `unsure mind'. This set me thinking.

It is one thing that Sid is very sure of his mind at times to the limit of madness. This apart do we need to regiment our brains to be sure. How would that be sure, fixed, straight, minds. What about creativity ? How will Sid learn to spread his wings and fly towards the sky if he has a sure mind. For a sure mind would know that humans do not have wings to fly.

The naming....

As Rajesh said it, we humans are so much into categorizing. It makes life so very simple and easy for us to understand. But then all this naming and categorizing takes away from the simple joys of life...
Just as it has done in case of Sidharth. The doctor who diagnosed him for autism did not want to label him and at that time I did not realise the importance of this. But now over the years as I see my six year old son being viewed differently and now I have begun to understand what Dr Vinay Malhotra actually meant four years back.
Looking at Sid, he is just as normal as any child and yet as abnormal as any other child. It is just the way we want to see him. Yes by calling him autistic we have taken away from him his right to a normal life. It is my endeavour to restore this right to him, this is the least I could do for him being his mother.
Just today morning I met Viren. Viren is Sid's new class mate and he lives very close to our place. Viren has some brain complication, a too long scientific name which I could not understand as his mother rattled it out. All I could piece together was that there was lack of oxygen in some part of Viren's brain. Today morning as he came to the bus stop, Viren greeted me. A smile lit up his face and he made my day.
Coming back to Viren's so called abnormality how many of us wear spectacles for our eyes are weak, how many of us carry blood pressure tablets for our BP keeps fluctuation, how many of us carry tablets along with us each day just because our heart would not beat correctly. I could go on. Are we also special children just like Viren, Siddharth, Vandit, Minrashah, Jessica.......

The Journey

It is strange and tiring and I am at least for my self have begun to show the signs of fatigue.

I always thought that my journey for and of life began with that of Sid and in this search I came upon friends who became my short cuts. They smoothened the path when I found it difficult to walk upon....they helped me go on and on when I felt I could not walk a step more.

But now I feel there are no shortcuts in ones journey. My privileges have now become my lack of ability to combat life. And what all along with my own self forget at time is that I am a born fighter .....

So once again I begin my journey...my walk ....my search to find a place under the Sun for Sid and myself.

Sid joins normal children

This is what I have been hoping of and striving for all these years.................

Sid finally gets to join a class of normal children. As per the Indian system of Education, Sid is now in UKG. Children of his age are in a year ahead of him. But then fine for me and more than that for Sid- my Lil Buddha.

The amazing fact about Sid is that he has this huge capacity to learn and remember. He picks up the spelling in a day and so does the mathematical sums. His short term recall memory is slightly bad but then over the time he is improving a lot.

The issue that troubles me with him is that he is too much into repetitive behaviour. He can ask one question ten times and that too in one go. This behaviour for others is annoying specially for the ones who do not know or can not judge that Sid is autistic

SIDDHARTH

Siddharth : Well let me introduce you to my six year old son Siddharth. Since this boy was two years old, he opened a new world for me. How? Sid, as we love to call him in short, is autistic. Till the time he was born, July 15, 2000, and more precisely till the day the diagnosis came, I was living life in a limbo - trying my best to be a good daughter, a good daughter in law and a good wife. With Sid, I made my choice, I just want to be a good human and in each day of my life to date, this six year old, who has a problem settling in the so called life of the normals, help me just do that, be a good human being, live life with sensitivity.

But then at the end of it all, it's just Siddharth who is important. Let me trace his life for myself. Siddharth did not speak for almost the two and a half years of his life. This is the point where my introduction with autism began. At this time Sid has no contact with the outside world. He had no words and no eye contact. As a mother I never could make out these things. A friend of mine, Jatinder Preet (JP) , who spent a day with Sid made this first diagnosis for me and from the visits to docs began. Finally the diagnosis came and I just did not know what to do as nothing in the name of help was there for me. Two people helped me make a contact with Sid, Pooja, Sid's first teacher and JP. Then as it has to happen, Sid was thrown out of each school he went to, two precisely. The reason at all places was same Sid was hyper and did not respond to his teachers the way they wanted him to. So Sid spent eight months at Ashirwaad a special school where Pooja helped Sid learn some of the tricks and trades of this world. From Ashriwaad Sid went to Darpan again a special school for autistic children and now Sid goes to Drishti, another school which is for normal children but then this school takes five handicapped children each year and integrates them with normal children. This is the first picture of my son Sid, more will follow.

The lost self

Hi, I am back. It is so very easy to loose self. The idea of simply shutting off is so very alluring. But then how long can one can do that with so many things happening around. Here is the list :
Medha Patkar of Narbada Bachao Andolan shows the way to make the mighty bend. Against all odds, the frail lady in cotton saree and white hair made sure that 35000 displaced families due to the Narbada Dam get their due rehabilitation. Kudos Medha.

True to her style Arundhati Roy showed how to live and fight for convictions. The Booker Lady with her NBA protest and arguments proved her mettle.

Amir Khan, some say has found his calling in life but then when he spoke up for the NBAs and the Bhopal Gas tragedy victims, he deserves a standing ovation.

Narender Modi once again proved how shallow, callous and inhuman he is by all the drama he put up for his incomplete 51 hour hunger strike. Shame Modi.

Back home Siddharth now begins his journey into a new school. He is in class upper kindergarten and will now be integrated with normal children.

Relationships continue to fox me and I remain as confused as ever.

Signing off :
Amrita

My Son Siddharth

When I created this blog even I didn't know why I was doing it. And today I got my answer. This is my space for Siddharth, my son who is an Autistic. I don't plan to get into the details of the clinical prognosis for Siddharth. We both plan to move forward.

Siddharth, will this April, begin to go to a big normal school Drishti. For over an year now Siddharth has been studying in a school for Autistic children called Darpan. Sid has been doing quiet well. But then each time stagnation comes into the development process of this child I panic. Sid who had been thrown out of the last school for his teachers were convinced that he will never be able to write, can now write upto 100, draw a few figures , write his English alphabets big and small and even a few words which have at the most three alphabets.

Siddharth loves to sing and his passion for music is immense. But then this limited to hearing and then singing alone. Sid, as I call him at times, has till time not shown any inclination for any particular musical instrument.
My search now is to introduce Sid to the world where people don't understand him or his state. I take him out to all places I go. But then these are as obvious the known places where no one objects to how Sid behaves. He is not a violent child but he restless, very active and cannot sit in one place for long. He cannot sit through a movie or sit straight in an restaurant. But then he has this immense capacity to connect with people on one to one level. Sid hates crowds and can manage to stand alone in a crowd . This is my first intro to my son and as I discover more of him each day, I will record it.

The Master of Music: Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

"Is enlightenment really possible for the average person? Yes. Big Yes. Enlightenment is very possible for the ordinary individual. Actually it is easier than for some one who thinks that they are special ....whenever someone is ordinary, simple, innocent and natural, that is enlightenment"

'THE day you feel hopeless, horrible, and worse, on that day get out of your room and ask people, What can I do you for you ? that service you have done that day will bring a revolution inside you. It will change your whole gramophone record.

‘LOVE is seeing God in the person next to us, and meditation is seeing God within us.’
‘THE more we open ourselves, the more room we will have for God to fill us’

‘A PRAYER Give me not thirst if you cannot give me water. Give me not hunger if you cannot give me food. Give me not joy if I cannot share. Give me not the skills if I cannot put them to good use.’

‘IN science you have knowledge first, and then FAITH follows. In spirituality, faith comes first, and then Knowledge follows. For example, the knowledge that pesticides and chemical fertilizers are good for plants came through science, and people had faith in it, and all over the world they were used. And then another knowledge came that they were not good and the faith shifted to organic farming. The same with antibiotics. The knowledge brought faith, the knowledge changed, and then faith changed.’

‘ENLIGHTENMENT is the very core of our being; going into the core of our self and living our life from there. We all came into this world gifted with innocence, but gradually, as we became more intelligent, we lost our innocence. We were born with silence, and as we grew up, we lost the silence and were filled with words. We lived in our hearts, and as time passed, we moved into our heads. Now the reversal of this journey is enlightenment.’

‘ IT is the journey from head back to the heart, from words, back to silence; getting back to our innocence in spite of our intelligence. Although very simple, this is a great achievement. Knowledge should lead you to that beautiful point of "I don't know." The purpose of knowledge is ignorance. The completion of knowledge will lead you to amazement and wonder. It makes you aware of this existence. Mysteries are to be lived, not understood. One can live life so fully in its completeness, in its totality.’

‘ ENLIGHTENMENT is that state of being so mature and unshakable by any circumstance. Come what may, nothing can rob the smile from your heart. Not identifying with limited boundaries and feeling "all that exists in this universe belongs to me," this is enlightenment.’

‘OUR breath plays a very important role. The breath is the connecting link between the inner world of the mind and the outer world of body and environment. You see, there are seven levels of existence, body, mind, intellect, memory, ego and being. Meditation works by bringing an effort from the level of being to the mind. With the breath we bring this effect to the physical level as well.’

‘LET it be. If the ego is there, just embrace it, take it.’

’FEAR is egocentric. Worship is the only way to let go of the fear. In worship you say, "It's all you, and you, and you.’

‘OUR ego wants to do something that is very difficult. The ego is not ready to accept something simple, something natural, something that is easily available. The nature of the ego is to do difficult things, not simple ones’

‘THE Divine is not an object of the ego. It doesn't demand from you something that is impossible for you. You don't have to do something that you cannot do. No need for that at all.’

’WHEN the ego dissolves, all discomforts go away with the ego. Discomfort is not because of "something;" it is because of ego -- a separated-ness.’

‘THE direction of life is towards one thing: that is love. You be prosperous and have no love, that prosperity has no value. You are on spiritual path but you don't experience, then that spiritual path is no path, it is very dry: it's all up here.’

‘THE secret is hidden somewhere very deep, and that is what we can call the Divine Love -- that love which is so total, which is so complete, and which is so fulfilling.’

’LOVE, the Divine Love, everyone is looking for such a love that never dies. As time goes it seems to be dying out. You see? Love dies out as time goes. But we are looking for some love that stands the time -- the old, ancient, strong, powerful Love.’

‘WHEN we express love too much, then also it disappears, dies out. It's like when you keep the seed on the surface of the soil, not a little deep inside, it doesn't grow.’

‘THE purpose of every practice -- spiritual practice, meditation, breathing techniques, and kriya, all this -- is to uncover something that blocks the expression of Divine Love.



Jai Gurudev,
The folowing Sutras, Compliments of:

R.Praveenji



Desire for Happiness

Your desire for pleasure or happiness makes you
unhappy. You examine---whenever you are miserable or
unhappy, behind that is your wanting to be happy.



Become Free

Before this earth eats you up, become free---free from
this feverishness that is gripping your mind, free
from
this craving for happiness.



Unlimited Joy

Your mind is not reasy for limitations. It wants
unlimited joy, unlimited pleasure---which the five
sense cannot give you.



Love Does n't Stay

Everyone loves in this world.Everything loves. But
that love does n't stay too long as love. It
immediately becomes hatred, almost immediately. But
yoga is that skill, that preservative, that maintains
that love as love throughout.



Wrapping Paper

Mind is that cover that is holding the Divine, the
Divinity within us. Once that wrapping paper is
unwrapped, you find, "Oh, this beautiful gift is here
within us!" You know, it's like everyone is given a
Christmas package, a beautiful package, and they live
with the beautiful without even opening it.


Eliminate the Cause

Eliminate the cause, the very root of negativity in
us. Instead of rubbing the mind with a positive
thought, go deep into yourself through the breath,
through meditation, and cleaning the system.


Belonging

You can't cultivate the "sense of belonging". You drop
the stresses and fear---it comes in. You already
belong to this entire existence. You 're not separate.



Mind is a Field

Mind is not just in one location. Mind is a field,
like
an electric field. Like an electromagnetic field, it's
present all over.



Garbage Collectors

A master does n't need any favor from you. He just
could take all that anguish and garbage which you
cannot lift by yourself, free you from that. All
enlightened masters on this planet are garbage
collectors. They do nothing other than collect the
garbage.



Suffering

Suffering is a product of limited knowledge.




You Think You Know

You think you know the world and "This is it". That is
the biggest problem. This is not just one world; there
are many layers in this world.



Only You

One one lever there are individuals everybody is
different---they 're young, old, intelligent, wise,
dull and all types. One one level we have different
types, but on a deeper level there is only you. Only
you, nothing else.


Longing

When you give a space, the longing in you increases,
whether it is for your spouse,or for God, or for
Guru---whatever. And when there is longing, your love
becomes really strong,powerful,unshakeable.



Partial Knowledge

Shadows appear very big, much bigger than you, but
they have no existence. Smaller the light, bigger the
shadow appears. If it is total darkness, then also
there is no shadow. So partial knowledge,a partial
light,partial vision,brings the shadow. And it makes
the shadow appear very huge, very big. But know it is
just a shadow.



Forgiveness

Forgiveness shield and protects your mind, your
spirit,
from being violent.



Just Happening - Surrender


You are a happening in this ocean of consciousness.
Your heart beats by itself; you're not making it beat.
Your breath moves by itself, sleep comes, you feel
hunger, you feel thirsty, you feel good, you feel bad.
All these phenomenon are happening in your life. When
this realization comes, a deep relaxation, a trust, a
feeling of "at home" and fullness arises in you. That
is surrender.



Nothing to lose


What are you afraid of ? What do you think you will
lose ? Just wake up and see you have nothing to lose
in the first place ! And, even if you think you have
something, how long can you hold on to it ?



Surrender is Not

Surrender is not an act. It's not again and again
trying to bow down and say, "Oh, I am surrendering,
I am surrendering." Saying that to yourself a hundred
times---that is not surrender.



Surrender Is

Open your hands up---that is surrender. It is your
very nature.



God is Not

God is not the object of sight; you can never see
God. God is not an object of hearing. God is not an
object of smelling or tasting. God cannot be perceived
through your senses, nor through the mind.


God Is

God is the Seer himself. Who sees---that is God.



Seeing God

You can live God. You can be God. But you cannot
"see" God, perceive God as an Object

Woman and rape

Had a chance to view a play recently. Pali Bhupinder well known theatre personality and playwright was the man and the pen behind this play. The play revolved around the issue of child rape and pain revolving around this issue. Sadly the play turned out be the oft repeated regressive Indian male psyche though the author of the play differs with me till date.
As usual the play had this mentally tormented girl Rose who at a school going age is raped by a much elderly man. To escape the social stigma and pain Rose's family shifts to a new place but Rose grows up to be a complex personality. She is pursued relentlessly by a boy belonging to a rich powerful politician family. Finally Rose relents to the boys request to marry her but on the condition that he be told about her rape. True to a filmy style the boy says it is not her fault but his Mom objects. Suddenly the play turned around with the rapist of Rose turning out to be the boys Father. Both the boy and his mother break their relationship with the rapist man and agree to wed Rose and make her their Bahu.
Brave ending and the play received many a congratulations.
But as a woman I fail to understand two things. How long will we contiue to make rape something much more than physical violation. I personally feel much a problems related to female sexuality can be solved if we women stop attatching so much importance to it. Why in the entire play had Rose to feel ,'shrapit,' condemned through out her life and why does she have to feel redeemed only after another male tells her that Rape is not her fault. All this when in these times we talk of women empowerment. Rose's balance in life comes after she gets married. One male rapes her and another tells her that it is not her fault. Where is Rose in all this and where is her inner strength. Can't Rose empower her own self? Does she need to get married just to prove that being raped is not her fault?

The Master speaks.......

Interaction with OSHO

Student : Fruit falls on the ground when it is ripe. One day, you will leave us, and it will be impossible to have another master in your place.
Osho, when you leave the physical body, will your meditation techniques help our inner growth as they do now?

Osho: My approach to your growth is basically to make you independent of me.

Any kind of dependence is a slavery, and spiritual depen-dence is the worst slavery of all. I have been making every effort to make you aware of your individuality, freedom, your absolute capacity to grow without help from anybody.

Your growth is something intrinsic to your being. It does not come from outside; it is not an imposition, it is an unfolding.

All the meditation techniques that I have given you are not dependent on me — my presence or absence will not make any difference — they are dependent on you.

And the lady refuses!

I know, friends this is little late.

On January 17, media was splashed with the news that Arundhatti Roy had refused to accept the Sahitya Akademi Award. True to her style. This action of the writer has created a debate within the literary circles. While one section seconds Roy's decision, the other section claims that she is doing this to attract attention towards her for Sahiyta Akademi has nothing to do with the policies of the Government for it is an autonomous body. This section also goes on to give the name of activists like Mahasweta Devi who have, before Roy, accepted this awards. Well following is the writers explanation on why she took the step. Read and decide.

Celebrated writer Arundhati Roy on Saturday refused to accept the prestigious Sahitya Akademi Award in protest against the Indian Government toeing the US line by "violently and ruthlessly pursuing policies of brutalisation of industrial workers, increasing militarisation and economic neo-liberalisation". "I have a great deal of respect for the Sahitya Akademi, for the members of this year's Jury and for many of the writers who have received these awards in the past. But to register my protest and reaffirm my disagreement. Indeed my absolute disgust with these policies of the Indian Government, I must refuse to accept the 2005 Sahtiya Akademi Award", Arundhati said in a statement here.